The holiday season—it’s often painted as the most joyful time of the year, filled with gatherings, laughter, and connection. But if you’re someone who struggles with social anxiety, it can feel more like a minefield of stress, dread, and overwhelming expectations. Sound familiar? You’re not alone.

Whether it’s the pressure to be social at family events, navigating gift exchanges, or simply the stress of traveling, the holidays can be a particularly tough time for anyone with social anxiety. But don’t worry—we’re going to walk through some practical ways to manage your social anxiety during the holiday season so you can protect your mental health during this busy season.

WHY THE HOLIDAY SEASON IS CHALLENGING FOR PEOPLE WITH SOCIAL ANXIETY

Let’s be real—the holiday season is hard. It comes with a lot of social pressure, and for those of us with social anxiety, that can feel like too much to handle. Here’s why:

• Increased social obligations: From family dinners to work parties, the holidays can bring a packed schedule of social events. The expectation to constantly be “on” and socializing can trigger anxiety.
• Expectations of social performance: Whether it’s small talk at a party or making a good impression on extended family members, the pressure to be charming, interesting, or even just comfortable can feel overwhelming.
• Financial and gift-giving stress: For some, the holidays bring an added layer of financial stress, with expectations around gift-giving that can create anxiety about spending or whether your gifts are “good enough” or “too much.”
• Travel stress: Traveling for the holidays, especially if it means being around large crowds, can add to your social anxiety during the holiday season. Plus, spending extended periods of time in close quarters with family or friends can feel overwhelming.

STRATEGIES FOR MANAGING SOCIAL ANXIETY DURING THE HOLIDAY SEASON

The good news? You can take control of your social anxiety, even during the holiday madness. It’s all about having a game plan. Here are some strategies to help you navigate the season with more ease:

1. SET REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS

You don’t have to say yes to every single holiday event. In fact, it’s okay to skip some! Set realistic expectations for yourself. Maybe you attend the family dinner but skip the big New Year’s party. The goal isn’t to do everything, but to find a balance that allows you to participate while still protecting your mental health.

2. ESTABLISH BOUNDARIES

Boundaries are your best friend, especially during the holidays. If certain events or people tend to trigger your anxiety, it’s okay to set limits. Maybe that means staying at a party for only an hour or politely declining an invite altogether. While we don’t want anxiety to dictate our lives (because trust me, your world only gets smaller and smaller as anxiety grows), that doesn’t mean you have to do everything. Live by YOUR values. This is something I talk about a lot inside the OCD and Anxiety Recovery Blueprint.

3. PREPARE FOR SOCIAL SITUATIONS

Preparation can go a long way in reducing social anxiety during the holiday season. If you’re worried about awkward silences or not knowing what to say, try brainstorming some conversation starters beforehand. You can also rehearse responses to common questions you’re likely to get, like “How have you been?” or “What are you up to these days?”

4. BRING A SUPPORT PERSON

If possible, bring someone you trust to social events. Having a supportive person by your side can make a world of difference. They can help ease you into conversations or act as a buffer when things get overwhelming. Just knowing you have someone in your corner can reduce a lot of the pressure.

PRACTICAL TOOLS TO REDUCE SOCIAL ANXIETY IN THE MOMENT

Even with the best-laid plans, anxiety can still pop up when you’re in the middle of a holiday gathering. Here are some quick tools to help you manage it in real-time:

• Grounding techniques: If your anxiety starts to spike, try focusing on your senses. Notice what you can see, hear, touch, taste, and smell. Grounding yourself in the present moment can help you feel more centered.
• Deep breathing: Take slow, deep breaths, focusing on making your exhales longer than your inhales. This can help activate your body’s relaxation response and reduce feelings of panic.
• Take breaks: Don’t be afraid to step away if you need a moment to regroup. Whether it’s going to the bathroom for some quiet time or stepping outside for fresh air, giving yourself space to breathe can help calm the storm.
• Visualize a safe space: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, close your eyes for a few seconds and imagine yourself in a place where you feel completely safe and relaxed. It can be your bedroom, a favorite vacation spot, or anywhere that brings you comfort. This mental “escape” can help soothe your anxiety.

While these are great strategies that help in the moments, I don’t want you to turn to these as long-term coping mechanisms. For 5 strategies to help you manage your anxiety and intrusive thoughts (that I guarantee you have NOT heard before and that actually work long-term, head here for a FREE 60 minute masterclass. 

COMMUNICATING YOUR NEEDS TO FAMILY AND FRIENDS

One of the hardest parts about managing social anxiety is feeling like you have to do it alone. But guess what? You don’t. Communicating your needs to family and friends can make a huge difference.

If certain situations are triggering for you, let people know ahead of time. For example, you might say, “I’m really excited to come to the holiday party, but I might need to leave early if I start feeling overwhelmed.” Being upfront helps set expectations and takes some of the pressure off.

Remember, you’re allowed to ask for help. If you need someone to accompany you to an event, to step in during a conversation, or just to check in with you throughout the night, don’t hesitate to ask. The people who care about you will understand.

MAINTAINING PROGRESS IN ANXIETY RECOVERY DURING THE HOLIDAYS

It’s easy to feel like your anxiety recovery goes out the window during the holidays, but it doesn’t have to be that way. By setting boundaries, communicating your needs, and using tools to manage your anxiety, you can protect the progress you’ve made.

Remember, progress doesn’t mean being anxiety-free. It’s about learning how to manage your anxiety when it shows up. The holidays are a great opportunity to practice the coping strategies you’ve been working on—whether it’s grounding yourself in the moment, communicating clearly with others, or setting healthy limits.

Give yourself grace. The holidays are stressful for everyone, and it’s okay if you feel anxious. What matters most is how you respond to that anxiety. By taking small, mindful steps, you can make it through the season with your mental health intact.

If you’re looking for even more support in managing your anxiety or OCD, I encourage you to check out my OCD and Anxiety Recovery Blueprint. It’s a step-by-step guide packed with evidence-based strategies to help you take control of your anxiety and move forward in your recovery. Whether it’s the holidays or any other time of year, having the right tools makes all the difference. 

You’re stronger than your anxiety, and with a little planning and self-care, you can make it through the holiday season feeling empowered and at peace. You’ve got this!